​How to Talk (and Listen) to Your Senior Loved One
 
Perhaps you've taken time from your job or traveled from another state to visit your aging friend or relative. You want to make the most of your time together. But sometimes it seems that they aren't really listening to you or are distracted. You may leave thinking you just didn't get any satisfactory visiting done. 
 
Yet, your senior loved one still wants to hear what you have to say and wants to communicate with you, too. Physical changes make hearing and speaking harder.  If you understand ways to help, your conversations should improve and give joy to everyone.

• Aging affects speech and hearing. As bones age, they change shape, including in the rib cage which restricts breathing. Decreased heart function, lack of physical strength, and fading hearing make the actual work of speaking and listening a real challenge. The strain of failing to hear or to be heard may simply make someone give up trying. Be aware of the physical limitations of your loved one.
• Time of day matters. Aging adults have better cognitive function between 8:30 and 10:30 in the morning than later in the day or in the evening. Time your visit for the hours when they are energetic and alert, not just before naptime or after a meal.
• You can set the stage. Sit near enough to be heard, but not in front of a bright window. Adjust the light in the room so that you can be seen face-to-face, which will help them read your lips and expressions as an aid to conversation. Reach out and touch when appropriate and add emphasis with social cues like smiling, patting, or nodding.
• Don't make it harder. Speak clearly. Keep your hands away from your mouth. Don't chew gum or hold a water bottle in front of your face while you're talking. Don't turn away or get distracted by your phone. Keep your attention on the one you are conversing with. Don't tire your friend with a long visit.
• Listening is just as important as talking. It might take longer for your senior friend to express what they want to say, so give them plenty of time and encouragement. Ask leading questions, like "Do you want to tell me about your day?" or "Is there something I should know?" instead of routinely inquiring about their meals. Because a person is aging doesn't make them boring or want to be bored. They may have opinions on current events, stories about friends and relatives, or just a need to tell you how much they love you.

 
If your first conversations seem frustrating, keep trying. No matter what their situation, everyone wants to communicate with others. You might find unexpected gems of wisdom if you speak effectively and listen carefully.
 
Kim Rayas
Residence 600
kim@residence600.com
www.residence600.com
600 E. Elm
Salina KS 67401
(785) 822-1300

A 90th anniversary celebration of "The Star-Spangled Banner" officially becoming the national anthem of the United States took place Wednesday at Residence 600. 

Residents sang and commemorated the event with help from the Salina VFW Auxiliary. Residence 600 is a senior living community at 600 E. Elm Street in Salina.

Kathy McCandless, junior vice president of the VFW Auxiliary was invited by Kim Rayas, executive director of Residence 600, to collaborate on an anniversary event.

“We thought it was a great idea,” said McCandless. “In addition to flags for everyone, we have commemorative coins for all veterans here today. On the back they say, thank you for your service.”

There were four veterans present among the 40 gathered for the festive outdoor ceremony.

The familiar lyrics of the song are from a poem written by lawyer and amateur poet, Francis Scott Key. The poem, entitled "The Defence of Fort McHenry," was written after Key witnessed the bombing of Fort McHenry in Baltimore Harbor during the War of 1812.

The next morning he saw the flag still flying and began to write the patriotic poem. The flag had 15 stars and 15 stripes and it was sewn by Mary Young Pickersgill. The flag became known as The Star-Spangled Banner.

Key’s poem was matched with an English drinking song by John Stafford Smith and it became popular. The Navy adopted the anthem in 1899. President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed it the national anthem in 1916, but no legislative action was taken.

The VFW led the fight to make "The Star-Spangled Banner" the national anthem. It played a significant role by gathering over 4 million signatures on a petition in 1929. It still took until March 3, 1931 for Congress to pass a bill and President Hoover signed it into law the next day, March 4, 1931.

“It represents our freedom,” said Terry Rogers, one of the residents. “It’s about the sacrifice that makes it possible for us to be here in America.”

Rogers always feels a sense of pride when he hears the song played.

The VFW Color Guard was invited to present arms and they led the presentation of flags as the anthem was played in front of Residence 600 on a beautiful Wednesday afternoon.

One of those present pre-dated the 90th anniversary. Maxine Skaggs, 101, remembers the anthem from her childhood to this day.

“I think it’s important, but I don’t like it when they jazz it up,” Skaggs said.

Maxine and her husband Leland moved into Residence 600 when it first opened.

“We waited for them to build it," Maxine said. "We lived in Phillipsburg for 50 years, but came here in our 80s to be closer to medical care.”

“I’m also older than the women’s vote,” Maxine said with a smile.

Her husband Leland was a veteran who was assigned to Dwight Eisenhower’s headquarters.

After the ceremony, everyone went inside for refreshments provided by the VFW Auxiliary. One of the veterans who received the commemorative coin was Eugene Rietbrock, who served in the Navy on aircraft carriers for 20 years.

“I remember hearing "The Star-Spangled Banner" when we were in port and they put everyone on deck,” Rietbrock said. “Everyone on the ground was watching us.”
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“Hearing the national anthem really means a lot to all of us,” Rayas said as she thanked the VFW Auxiliary for the snacks and the celebration of the anniversary for her residents.

​See the full story here:
https://www.salina.com/story/news/2021/03/04/celebrating-90th-birthday-americas-national-anthem/6919170002/?fbclid=IwAR1UGKvajCoaDEEu4ZlcrafdiiK6d1igTydAD1DRNT90UTvmce3agdNjl8o